mjmoss:

Haha my Uncle Arthur always does this.

My sister’s boyfriend, who I met for the first time this evening, asked me if I had a ‘partner’ in ‘français’.

I think it was his attempt to speak French (‘attempt’ being the operative word) and at the same time say, “bro, I know that you’re gay and, you know what, it’s cool. I’m a hip and modern kinda guy just like you except I like girls and to be honest I don’t feel comfortable with the word ‘boyfriend’ so I’ll say ‘partner’ instead to avoid anything uncomfortable, you know?”

But in doing so he actually made everything very uncomfortable indeed. Especially when I replied, “no” and for some unknown reason he then asked, “why not?”

One of my sisters is coming to visit me tomorrow for a couple of nights. I’m really looking forward to it; I miss her a lot. I’ve made a little itinerary for us because the only time she’s visited Paris was when I first moved over, but most of our time was taken up with bank meetings, insurance phone calls and angry French landlords.

Also, this is funny because she would kill me if she knew I was posting pictures of her on the internet.

I’m chatting to my mum on skype and she keeps saying ‘lol’. This is a new thing for her, but apparently, ‘even old folk can pick up on little jems (sic) like this’. Shame she can’t spell gems.

I’m not sure I can cope with this.

I just went downstairs and began talking to my mother. Then she started to cry.

“I’ve just been watching a programme about Elvis,” she said, “I hate watching dead people before they know they’re going to die.”

I laughed at her and her hysterics, but decided it would be best for all parties involved if I gave her a hug.

“He seems like such a nice man,” she continued, “and I never had the chance to meet him.”