January 2010
60 posts
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It's 3am and I have a phonetics lecture in 5...
Hahahahahahahaha.
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List
List Book travel home - Easter
Deo Organise Calender Haircut Skinny jumper(s)? Adaptor plug. Budget Dec. !!!i (+future) Camera ????? Gloves Paris guide/map Plan Iza’s visit Self-Discount CLEAN APPT Put pics up. (on wall) (Return ariel) SELL? PUT STUDY AIDS UP Email parents Clean out shower drain. Return library books.
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I only hang around with cool people
K: SO TIRED.
K: i have to go to the cinema for an "early birds" screening tomorrow
K: so i should go to sleep really
Me: Oh my god.
Me: With the kids?
Me: Or on your own?
Me: hahahahah
K: lol actually
Me: oh god
K: i'm far cooler than either of those options
K: i'm actually going with my mum
K: so fuck you, basically.
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I was just thinking about my phone and I received...
Maybe I should join a facebook group.
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Old Mother Hubbard
I didn’t realise it was physically possible for one human being to have as little food in their refrigerator as I do. There is quite literally nothing to eat. Odd concept. Couple that with the water being off for works (with the added effect that has on my ability to wash), I’m at a bit of a loss.
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So this is hilarious.
One day my friend mentioned in passing how annoying she finds those statuses where people express their pseudo-genuine undying love for one another in terrible English. Naturally, I dedicated my next status update to her:
Later that night, Lucy came round to my flat and we played on the Wii. She got hold of my computer while I was engrossed in a hardcore game of Mario Kart and intended to rape...
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Oh Mum. Don't you realise the reason you haven't...
Mum: i get an over whelming feeling you are pissed off with me?
Mum: I'm sorry if I have upset you in some way Matthew
Mum: Have a good sleep, thanks for your time and I'll speak to you again maybe, soon
Mum: bye
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Good Morning
So I woke up and dragged myself out of bed after the alarm clock’s dozen or so reminders. I started getting ready, then glanced at my phone clock and saw that it was actually an hour earlier than I’d set my alarm clock the previous night.
Brilliant. So I’m wide awake, but back in bed enjoying a nice 45 minutes of relaxing.
Good morning.
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Money, Money, Money
Yes, yes, yes. No need t’worry. Caisses d’Allocations Familliales just gave me EIGHT HUNDRED EUROS for living in this beautiful country.
I am so happy, heureux, content.
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All of which makes me anxious, at times unbearably...
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Lights on
Sometimes I amaze myself at just how absent-minded I can be. I find myself completing routine tasks while thinking about things totally unrelated.
This morning I was tying my shoelace, thinking about how useless I am at getting to History lectures on a Monday afternoon, and before I knew it I’d tied three knots in one shoe.
More frequently, I’ll be in the shower and totally forget if...
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whydoihaveablog:
When you pick up Chinese food and you are alone on a Saturday night, when the lady tells you to “have a great night!” she’s aware of the irony, right? The crippling, weeping irony?
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Speechless
Few things render me speechless; death is one of them.
My erratic and mostly psychotic thoughts have been eating me up for days, so I decided to unload a few of them onto a friend over the internet. We chatted light-heartedly about them for a few hours. In other words, those few hours were dedicated to me and my little world, which, in the grand scheme of things, I was just reminded isn’t...
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“Well, the best advice I ever got was: just be yourself, being someone else.”
– I don’t know what this means. But a very wise man just said it to me so I’m going to remember it and work it out in time.
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Me: What's big about that fringe?
Me: Do you think he's hot?
Me: He's not your typical gorgeous guy, but he has a lovely soul.
Me: Hahah, yes, I am my grandmother.
E: great, now my throat hurts from vomitting
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A la tac
There are a few things I want to talk about today, but I have this mother bitch of an essay to write for tomorrow, so I’m going to sign off and WRITE WRITE WRITE.
A plus à tous.
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I love this girl
I: im going to sleep now matthew. good night! oh and good luck! i hope things work out for you and you live happily ever after! fairy tale. i like them. life should be just like one.
M: That would be great. But really fucking annoying.
I: and too bloody predicatble.
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Panic Prevention
I am now Panic Prevention.
This is because it is the name of Jamie T’s first album, which I love. Jamie T’s album is called thusly because he suffers from panic attacks and music became therapeutic for him, therefore it prevents panic.
I don’t suffer from panic attacks (I don’t suffer from anything, really) and I don’t find making music therapeutic (mainly because I...
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To Conclude
So what happened has actually left things much worse in my opinion than I had envisaged, despite the fact we haven’t even talked about it. I feel we should, but I only ever have the courage when I’m drunk and that’s always a bad time for me to be talking generally, let alone about important things.
What I’ve decided, then, is to give up. I don’t like giving up, but I...
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Name change happens tomorrow.
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No one ever really dies. Do you believe that? Well...
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I am, I am Israel's son, Israel's son I am.
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But everything's irrelevant, isn't it?
Don’t worry, I’m just bitter.
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Sealing the Deal
I am officially the worst person in the world at sealing the deal. I tried, but to very little avail in the end. It has answered a few important questions, but left a whole load more wide open.
Nice one, nice one. Welcome back to Paris.
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Mum: And take some warm clothes. Just because you're Matthew that doesn't mean you'll freeze, because you won't!
Me: ... don't you mean that the other way round?
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The Search
Today I did a little bit of ‘research’ into finding a new, good blog name. I use the term ‘research’ loosely because it mainly consisted of looking around my room for inspiration and ended up with me checking the availability of words like ‘desk’ and ‘magazine’, venturing occasionally to slightly more daring names like ‘brokenclock’ but...
“Police in the United States say a woman punched through a McDonald’s...”
– “24-year-old Melodi Dushane was treated for injuries, then jailed.“ What the fuck? WHY WERE THERE NO NUGGETS? GIVE A BITCH HER 12-PACK. Shit. 2010 is looking pretty grim, you guys. (via extrafirmhold)
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